Skip to main content

Class 1
How to Fill Up the Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step,
with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and
The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss of Identity--Losing the Remote to Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How to Find Things--Starting With Looking In the Right Places and Not Turning the House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum .
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and Role-playing .
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and
Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.


Upon completion of any of the above courses,
diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Send this to all the guys that you think can stand the heat,
and to all the ladies for the best chuckle of their day!
Kim thinks you guys might need this!!
Jeff
Original Post

Replies sorted oldest to newest

SCAM ALERT!

Guys,
Don't be fooled, these courses are designed to humiliate you into paying for the far more expensive private lessons, and in the end, you'll either just be poorer for your efforts, or the courses will succeed, but you'll be so soft that even the latte sipping Miata drivers hanging out at Starbucks will start to pick on you.

There are plenty of ways to pre-test yourself in the privacy of your own home so you can avoid the public spectacle...

For example, watch some of the following videos, and if you find yourself yelling at the monitor or laughing out loud, don't sign up for course #10 (these are just a sampling, there are far longer examples of parallel parking which you should preview before taking the course), you're doomed to failure and could be coerced into signing up for the 2-year program - it happened to a guy that this guy I know knows!!!

A successful example...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_7gnScxodM
4+ minutes before realizing the spot was too small...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYXbddoVjTY
5 Minutes to get into a spot that is enormous...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rK6mughvEfY&feature=related
After watching as much as you can take of the above, here's a 7-second clip of a guy parallel parking
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vm7bdl9DUb0&feature=related
--- Dang, I'd love to be able to do that!

Jeff - as for sitting down getting you an 'A' - it isn't likely - you'll be knocked down for not flushing, or for taking too long - your only hope is to remove all reading materials and install one of those automatic flushers (and pray it never goes off in the middle of the night when the cat stops by for a drink).
Last edited by 5754
Post
×
×
×
×
Link copied to your clipboard.
×